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Shooting Party: Big Bangs in Little Bushworld
Tuesday, 30 January 2007 17:18
by Chris Floyd

Here's how it works in Jeb Bush's Florida: If you're a convicted felon who has served your time and paid your debt to society, you can't vote. (You also can't vote if you have a name that is remotely simil ar to a convicted felon's, or are the wrong color and thereby assumed to be a convicted felon, but that's another story.)

However, while being a convicted felon means you cannot take part in the democratic process in Florida (assuming, for the sake of argument only of course, that a democratic process actually exists in Florida), you can pack all the heat you want, even if you've served time for, er, blowing someone away. As the Sun-Sentinel reveals (via The Gun Guys ), "Florida has given concealed weapon licenses to hundreds of people who wouldn't have a chance of getting them in most other states because of their criminal histories. Courts have found them responsible for assaults, burglaries, sexual battery, drug possession, child molestation — even homicide."

Well, why not? After all, going armed is far more important than going to the polls. We certainly don't want any losers who lacked the political pull to stay out of prison — like, say, Jeb Bush's daughter Nicole — to be able to rejoin society and have their say at the ballot box. But we are very happy to supply them with weapons so they can utilize the handy tips they learned in stir. Who cares? It's a well-known fact that losers almost always prey on other losers, so it's not like too many real people get hurt.

The Sun-Sentinel has done yeoman service in digging up these revelations — a task made harder by the fact that Jeb's rubber-stamp Republican legislature last year "made the names of licensed gun carriers a secret." But hey — if you know up front who's got a rod and who doesn't, that takes the sport out of it, right? Especially with Florida's equally enlightened "Stand Your Ground" law, which essentially allows you to kill anybody whom you vaguely suspect might be a possible threat to you — sort of the pre-emptive "National Security Strategy of the United States" in miniature.

Shoot first, ask no questions later, and for God's sake, keep the riff-raff down: that's the Bush way — in Florida, in Washington, in the world!

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