Educational Darwinism Is Here

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Fri

Sep

2008

Written by Tom Chartier

Friday, 19 September 2008 09:22

by Tom Chartier

Don’t you just hate the weak and feeble holding back the herd? I know I do. But the wolves are being shot off in Wyoming. At least the ones in Washington are still safe. So we’re stuck with bad genes proliferating. Just look at the members of Congress.

Well, we can’t have a society of defectives now can we? Fortunately, times have changed and whether by “intelligent design” or pure chance a new form of Darwinism has emerged. The tired old Social Darwinism of the past has evolved into Educational Darwinism.

Actually, Educational Darwinism is nothing new. It has just been kicked up a notch.

Now those of us who went to school… and I presume that includes most of us… just might remember the idea that everybody was supposed to learn. Teachers tried to reach out to as many of their students as possible. The more fires ignited the better. We really don’t want a society of nincompoops do we?

Or do we?

A well-educated society just might… and I shudder at the thought… be hard to fool. Can you imagine the pure chaos of a couple million knowledgeable individuals exercising their right to vote… and doing it intelligently? The horror. The horror. Considering the fact that nobody qualified actually seeks elected office (with a few exceptions), we’d have ourselves a real ruckus. Things might get out of hand even worse than at the RNC convention!

That’s where the modern miracle of Educational Darwinism comes into play. Yes! With E.D. society can be properly structured into 5% elites and 95% worthless peons, just like Tsarist Russia! I know what group I’m in. I’m with the majority. How about you?

Time-honored methods of teaching have gradually been replaced with bells and whistles. Educational programs are looking more and more like Las Vegas extravaganzas complete with sequined pasties. Why? Well… glitz and glitter sells. Duh.

Consider the COW, Little Shrub Neil Bush’s edu-scam, Curriculum On Wheels. Just roll a video projector into the classroom and blast cartoons at the kids. Hey, kids love cartoons! And cartoons are even better within the sanctity of the classroom. They burn time. Unfortunately, in this Bush get rich quick scheme the COW has not taken a dump. At least the teachers won’t have to clean up the mess. But the parents will.

Another grand scheme in turning our future into a clan of Neanderthals is my favorite math program, Everyday Mathematics. I was never religious before my son was inflicted with EM but now I know The Truth. Satan is real… and he develops math programs.

EM is brilliant for separating the will haves from the will not haves. You see EM teaches… make that exposes, our tykes to a spiraling ball of confusion. Never does EM stay with one concept long enough for it to be locked down in the minds of the students. Ok, we did angles in this section… on to algebra or fractions or some ancient Egyptian form of division next. Addition, subtraction, multiplication? Huh? You mean the basics? Forget those… oh… I see Junior already has. Excellent! He gets a C. That’ll keep him working in Burger World or Home Dumpster Hellhouse forever… like most future American workers.

As the world is full of absurdities, Everyday Mathematics is right up there with COW. For the first five years of alternative concepts our children are forbidden to use a calculator. Good! I agree as long as they are taught the things a calculator does, like add, subtract, multiply and divide. However, too good to be true, in year six of EM they are issued… a calculator! What the (vernacular sent to the principal’s office)? Are the geniuses behind EM actually admitting that… EM does not work?

I don’t suppose the Chicago University Mathematics Project that cooked up EM would ever admit they were wrong. However, since by the sixth grade, EM students are expected to be unable to figure out the cost of an iPod, best to move on to differential equations so none of the parents will catch on. Hence the distribution of the Texas Instruments’ kiddy calculator. You don’t suppose Texas Instruments and the creators of EM are in cahoots?

Now at 13 years old, my son has been required by his school to purchase a “graphing calculator.” A Texas Instrument (what else?) TI 83 or 84 is recommended, or even better a TI 89. What in the Sam Hill is that you ask? I don’t know. I bought the damned thing. It only cost me twice as much as my Dive Master Special Jeep… But, I’m not bitter.

It looks to me like the TI 89 can accurately calculate the trajectory of a 125 million dollar Mars Probe vanishing into space. Holy Buzz Lightyear! I could have done that with a piece of paper and a pencil! Maybe the JPL whiz-bangs were addicted to calculators. You would expect that in a sane world, one of them might have noticed the numbers were goofy. Anyway, I hope and pray The Boy puts this new fangled gizmo to good use so he can enter that elite 5% and afford a decent rest home for me to die in.

In a way, EM is like the friendly neighborhood crack dealer. The first one was free and then they took it away! Awe gee… you’re addicted now? Here, let me help. I’m your friend. Since you are a regular I’ll cut you some slack, this time. But, no discount on the next calculator.

What is going on with our educational system? Like so much in America, unscrupulous people are seeing education as an opportunity to suck the blood out of the turnips. And that is all they care about. God forbid students should grow up understanding what a $3 trillion dollar war might mean.

Most teachers still have their hearts in the right place. They try their best but struggle against insipid programs purchased by gullible and inept administrators under pressure from spoiled and aggressive parents, usually in the wannabe elite stratosphere and sold by snake oil salesmen.

Equal education for all is passé. Now is the time for education to weed out those who will rule from those who will toil in the munitions factories. It is another element in the destruction of the middle class. And it fits in well with Bush’s diabolical No Child Left Behind program. Get a head start with Educational Darwinism!

Two legs good! Four legs better!

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Educational Darwinism Is Here
Friday, 19 September 2008

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