George W. Bush has pulled no punches in describing how he feels about his
enemies. "Our war against terror is a war against individuals whose hearts
are full of hate," he says, brimming with sincerity. Why are those hearts
full of hate, you ask? As always, Dubya's got the answers: "People say,
well, why-and I know a lot of kids are probably asking, well, why America?
And you've just got to understand that the enemy hates us because of what we
love."
So, we wonder, what do "we" love that "they" love to hate? Bush is again
happy to clarify: "They hate us because we love the idea that people can
worship an Almighty God any way he or she sees fit. They hate us because we
love political discourse and a free society. They hate us because of our
free press. They hate everything about us, because of our freedom ... They
don't like the thought of Christian, Jew and Muslim living side by side in
peace ... The more we value the ability to worship God the way we see fit,
the more they hate us. The more we honor church and synagogue and mosque,
the more they hate us. The more we speak our mind freely, the more they hate
us."
The hate that fills their hearts, explains Bush, can manifest itself in many
ways-not all of them obvious. "Let me tell you something else about the
enemy," the commander-in-chief warns. "They're resourceful, they're
slippery, they're the ones who hide in caves."
However, there is one small problem with the whole
they-hate-us-because-we-love-freedom line of thinking. None other than Osama
bin Laden himself has declared: "If Bush says we hate freedom, let him tell
us why we didn't attack Sweden, for example." (Public Enemy #1 has an ironic
sense of humor. Who knew?)
In light of this paradox, I took it upon myself to investigate and I came up
with something interesting Dubya said way back in 2002: "Let me first talk
about how to make sure America is secure from a group of killers, people who
hate — you know what they hate? They hate the idea that somebody can go buy
a home."
There's an inherent logic at play here. Bush tells us that the same folks
"who hide in caves" also "hate the idea that somebody can go buy a home"
here in the land of the free. Hey, if you lived in Cave #12 on the northeast
corner of Bora Bora Street, you might also be a little envious when your
average infidel plops down 10% to become the alleged owner of a pre-fab in
Levittown. Toss in a two-car garage and good schools and it's practically an
engraved invitation for jihad.
While this is all starting to make sense, it does provoke further questions.
What about condos? Where does al-Qaeda stand on co-ops? Would Bin Laden
prefer a fixed rate or a balloon mortgage? Should we expect tighter security
around the next open house we attend or maybe metal detectors at the local
real estate broker's office?
But, let's face it, this is no time for questions. If George W. Bush says,
"They hate the idea that somebody can go buy a home," there's only one thing
every red-blooded god-fearing Murrican must do: Get up to your ears in debt
and get yourself the biggest house you can find. Remember, if you don't buy
a home...the terrorists win.
(This message brought to you by the National Association of Home Builders)
Mickey Z. can be found on the Web at http://www.mickeyz.net.
Writings 
George W. Bush has pulled no punches in describing how he feels about his
enemies. "Our war against terror is a war against individuals whose hearts
are full of hate," he says, brimming with sincerity. Why are those hearts
full of hate, you ask? As always, Dubya's got the answers: "People say,
well, why-and I know a lot of kids are probably asking, well, why America?
And you've just got to understand that the enemy hates us because of what we
love." 
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